Ladies and Gentlemen: Mr Blumenthal

I have finally found someone who is more of a scatterbrain than moi. This is what Mark has been up to recently:

(a) Before going on holiday, Mark lost his credit card, reported it missing and requested a new card. He had to call the credit card company shortly after returning from holiday. The conversation went something like this:

Mark: Hello, I'm calling to report a lost credit card

Credit card company: Yes, Mr Blumenthal, we've already noted the loss and have sent you a replacement card.

Mark: That's exactly the problem. I've already received the replacement card and I've lost that one too.

(b) He then lost his mobile while he was in a shop somewhere, and was convinced someone had nicked it. He went outside the shop and heard his phone ringing. He said "The bastard that stole my phone is in the vicinity: I can hear it ringing". It turned out to be in his pocket.

(c) Whilst cycling to the station, a route he cycles every day, he saw an i-pod lead lying in the road. Ever the dutiful citizen, he picked it up and hung it from the branch of a nearby tree, figuring that whoever had lost it would probably re-trace their tracks and would see it there, where it would would also be safe from traffic. Cycling past on the way home, he noticed it was gone. Good, he thought: it has been restored to its rightful owner. Only a few days later he realises he couldn't find his own ipod cable. And then it dawned on him - he had probably dropped the cable himself the day before he found it. So he had in fact hung his own ipod cable on the branch of a tree for someone else to chav.

Mark is younger than me. He should be worried, very worried indeed!