Is James Really Australian?

I'm beginning to wonder. Look at the evidence:

- I've never seen him wear a hat with corks on
- He never turns to me in the morning and says "G'day"
- He never refers to me as a Sheila
- He never spontaneously sings "Tie my kangeroo down, sport"
- He doesn't drink XXXX, and apparently Australians don't give a four x about any other kind of beer
- To my knowledge, he's never once wrestled a crocodile.

Why would someone go around pretending to be Australian when they are quiet clearly not? Well, I'm on to him - oh yes, I'm on to him alright!